Tenuous-ness-less

DAY 1

Inauspicious beginnings... But fuck that shit.


We get to the park as soon as the gates open. Oddly enough, it's the longest wait (queue-wise) we have over all three days. I guess that's because no one is hungover yet. A mini-debate begins as to whether we should see Hockey or Henry Clay People. Since Hockey is better than your favorite band (not really), we head to our first stage (The Arcade) to kick off the festival.

What's that text message? A severe storm warning is in effect for Chicago? Sweet.

Hockey - Frontman; gay, straight, or asexual? None would have surprised me. 8th-note hi-hat all day long (played by a Eugene Hutz look-a-like), yet still strangely compelling. Their sound problems linger for a bit, when all of a sudden; the music stops.

What a start to the festival.

So the band starts hurling Budweiser tall boys (24 oz.) into the crowd while the sound crew gets their shit together. And eventually they do... Sorta.

Hockey returns to the stage, begins playing and they almost get through the first song! Until the music cuts out once again. The band is pissed and rightfully so. The crowd is cheering, I'm booing, and I guess both should have been happening at the same time.

And so we head South to the opposite end of the park to get some early cardio in. It's raining, but nothing crazy... Yet.

Hey Champ - Down at the other end, at The Future, awaits just what we needed after the disappointment back at the The Arcade. It wasn't spectacular, and it may not have even been good... But it was fun. Hey Champ is a Chicago based, synth-heavy rock group. They probably don't belong on such a huge stage but they thrive in the situation. The music is danceable and the drummer is a madman, sometimes to the band's disadvantage. Plus, the keyboardist is doing this awesome undulating, pelvic-thrust boogaloo that gives us the giggles as well as some extra dance fodder.

Black Joe Lewis and the Honeybears - First show of many over at the V Dub stage. Why I even thought for a second that I might split time with The Knux is beyond me. Black Joe may not have been the very best show that day (and then again, they very well could have been, too), but they absolutely brought the most energy. If you can't dance to this show, then you plain can't dance. Not sure many bands have as much fun one stage as these cats do either. And for a while we forget about the rain.

And Jambase, if the best thing you have to say about the band is that they're a James Brown rip-off, well, then you spent too much time up at The Knux destroying your ear drums. Quick! Sound Tribe is coming on! Piss off!

The Knux - Shiti was by far my least favorite stage, but that doesn't mean that it was the worst... Everyone knows that Perry's was the worst. The stage just never sounded right. It had too much competition from V Dub down the hill, and the concrete road that it was settled upon did the acoustics no favors. Bass heaven if you're into droning and throbbing. So the Knux turned up the highs in order to counter the aural situation. Ear-killing.

We retreat back to Black Joe...

--

First impression: The visuals at this place are fucking amazing. And I don't mean the fabulous Chicago skyline that fills the horizon on every side of the festival grounds (After all, there is that huge lake which occupies some of the landscape), what I mean is the high definition screens which accompanied 4 of the 7 stages. It was basically like watching the concert in a movie theater... Just way fucking cooler because you were actually AT the show. HI-DEF, Bitch!

--
And it's still raining.

But it's cool, because I found my way Home.

The Builders and the Butchers - I picked up their latest album a week or so before the festival and so I needed to catch them in the flesh. They're playing what quickly would become my favorite venue of the weekend; a canopied piece of heaven centrally located and diametrically opposed to the Shiti stage. Protected from both rain, shine, and the enormous, claustrophobia-inducing crowds. It was my sanctuary.

Oh, and the Butchers were good, too. The sound was a bit off. I just don't think the volume was turned up loud enough. But, it was just loud enough to allow a bath in the the band's ominous, yet blithely-delivered pseudo-gospel. But, Jambase refers to them as a party band. Sigh.

Sound issues ultimately rule the day at this point, however.

Continuing back to where things began...

Bon Iver - This is my first (and only) freak out of the weekend. It's my first taste of a truly large crowd, and the rain is starting to wear on me. Maybe because it's raining harder than it has all day. Sidekick and I get hemmed in, separated from the rest of the group. More than anything it may have been the obstructed view that really bothered me. Tall people, combined with a sea of umbrellas is making vision an issue. Everything came so easy in the early going...

The crowd slowly thins out because I guess Bon Iver (Bone-E-Vere) is wicked "depressing" or whatever. What did you think you were getting into? To be honest, I think it fits the soggy afternoon perfectly. This collection of songs played is truly beautiful, steadily walking the line between heartbreaking and inspiring. I love it. But still I really want to try and check out the Heartless Bastards...

Fail.

I only make it to the Shiti Stage, where I catch The Virgins wrapping up their set. Not enough to make any kind of reasonable judgment.

And where the fuck are my friends?

And why is it still raining...? Stop already.

Where's a fucking poncho when you need one?

Breathe.
--

Hollywood Holt sounds all right over at Perry's. And in a good way.

I meet my buds, get my poncho, and try to break off this skeptical shell that begins to close in on me.

Back at The Arcade, Fleet Foxes are on, buuuuut we kinda don't care. Deuce doesn't like them. I'm neither on the fence nor off the fence.

So we go over to the "restrooms" and get high beneath the trees. How come all the pissers at this place are located in the most shady areas? Oh, so your shit doesn't completely stink out the place? Sidekick and I have quite compartmentalization technique when we share a throne. It keeps the line moving and it's a sight to behold. Hand-sanitizer? Don't mind if I do... Fuck Swine Flu is right.

The Decemberists are fast approaching from a far, and I should probably find a condom so I can play this next one safe.

The poncho makes me look kinda like the Apple from the fruit of the loom commercials. Yes, I'm at peace with that at this point. BC are wearing them, too, and it makes me more comfortable even though theirs were clear (and not red).


The Decemberists - Hazards of Love begins and the band is dressed accordingly. My one complaint is that some of the shows just didn't seem to rock as hard as they should have, Decemberists included. I think the sound crew is a little hesitant, especially after that fucking disaster back at The Arcade earlier... I wonder, do sound techs get promoted and demoted like major league pitchers? I mean, let's say you started off at the Hockey set and well, you fucked up. Do they send you over to V Dub hoping to either help you regain confidence and/or simply stir up the mixture like a New England Cardinal circa 1981 (the bullpen)? And then if you still can't get it right, do they then send you over to Shiti as penance (the minors)?

I wonder.

Decemberists play a great set. The songs were tight (and for good reason), the visuals were dramatic, and Shara Worden (playing The Queen) made me howl like a bonewolf.

By the way, all day Bud Light tall boys can really break a fucking seal. I actually stopped drinking for like a 2-hour period centered around the Bon Iver set. Maybe that's why I freaked out... I need 24 ounces of stiff cylinder in my hand at all times in order to make me feel truly comfortable.

Until this happened.


Andrew Bird - He's a Red Giant in a galaxy of White Dwarves. He's just brighter than everyone else. Dude can play the guitar and violin better than you, can whistle better than you, and has a greater grasp of the English language than you. Although to be fair, you are probably less strange and more sociable. His music is most accurately categorized as charming, and secondly intriguing. And again followed closely by lovely.

Even though the Decemberists captured my emotions, I was still a little on edge. But the Birdman managed to bring me right back to earth. Scythian Empire is what did it for me. It was at that moment when I realized that all was well and we were in for a pleasant evening, even if the first day of Lolla were almost over.

They've run out of Tall Boys and I'm not buying it. Think they'll have more tomorrow? Yeah, I doubt it, too. Fuck.

We got Wisco Gold back at the spot anyway.


The Kings - We shun the big cats because our weathered, prideful egos won't allow it. Yet no matter how hard we try to take them apart, or break them down, they're a good band... Even if we don't really like them. They deserve what they're getting and they showed how appreciative they were to be in that position. From a far, at least, the show sounded and looked real sharp. BC got pretty close and seemed to enjoy themselves...

Let's see Kid Cudi before we leave!

Whoops! Let's get the fuck out of here!

Asshole anyone?

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Omissions and shared stories in the comments, if you would be so kind.